I run a small woodworking shop. My cousin asked me to build a custom bookshelf for his new house. When I gave him the quote, he said 'family price, right?' I said I'd knock off 10%, which still leaves me barely covering materials and time. He went quiet and later told my mom I was being greedy. Now my mom is hinting I should just do it for cost. This is the third time this year. How do you all handle this without blowing up the family?
Family Business
The awkward moment when your family expects discounts because you own a business
I stopped giving family discounts after my brother-in-law asked me to remodel his bathroom for free. I just say 'I can't afford to work for free, but I can refer you to someone.' It's awkward for a week, then it's over.
The 'family price' thing is a trap. Once you give it, they expect it forever. I had to have a direct conversation with my parents that my business is not a charity. They didn't love it, but they got over it.
My aunt wanted me to cater her anniversary party at cost. I told her I'd do it if she covered ingredients and my assistant's wage, but I wouldn't make a profit. She said that was still too expensive. You can't win with some people.
Have you tried just saying no outright? 'I don't offer family discounts because it's not sustainable for my business.' No explanation needed. The people who actually care about you will understand.
It's not greedy to charge for your work. Your cousin is being unfair. The fact that he went to your mom instead of talking to you directly says a lot.
I run a bakery and my family expects free cakes for every birthday. I finally started saying 'I can do a small discount, but I can't give it away.' Now they just don't ask as much.
My wife's family is the same. They think because I'm self-employed I have unlimited free time. I started sending them my standard price list with a note that says 'friends and family get 5% off, no exceptions.' It's cut down on the requests.
The mom part is the hardest. She's probably just trying to keep the peace. But you need to be clear with her too. Tell her it puts you in a bad spot when she takes his side.
This is why I don't do business with family. It's a boundary issue. You're not a bad person for wanting to be paid for your labor.
My uncle asked me to fix his computer for free. I told him my hourly rate. He laughed and said 'I'll just buy a new one.' Fine by me.
Thanks for the input. I think I'm going to have to just be firm with my cousin and tell my mom that I can't keep doing this. It's tough because I don't want to cause a rift, but I also can't keep losing money.